http://www.adventconspiracy.org/ - Watch this video, it is awesome!
I love the advent conspiracy theme, it encompasses overall what I believe about life. Frugal isn't just about getting a deal, it is about using less and being there more. Consumerism, even when done with super sales and triple coupons, is still consumerism and it doesn't bring happiness.
Our church is pushing this theme this year and I am so thankful for that. The funny thing is that we are supposed to spend less on Christmas and then give half of what we don't spend to a charity of our choice. However, Super B and I already don't spend much on Christmas and there just isn't anything to cut back on in terms of presents etc. So for us the challenge will be to give away more this Christmas in terms of actual cold hard cash. I admit that while I am pretty good about curbing desires to spend money, I don't have a natural propensity to give money away either. As some Christians might phrase it, I don't have the gift of giving. So deciding how and what extra to give this year may be interesting. Of course I would love to give by taking on more pro-bono doula or childbirth class clients and perhaps that will happen. I guess we will bump along until Christmas and see what happens. In the mean time I am loving the Advent Conspiracy!
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Spot/article about doulas on Today show
http://today.%20msnbc.msn.%20com/id/27808452/
Great article, less great TV spot, feel free to read my comment below as to why....
I find it funny that one of the OB's main comments focused on liability. "If something goes wrong, who is liable?" (meaning between the doula, parents or doctor) Liability is definitely an issue at the heart of so many of the problems in maternity care and certainly at the top of most OBs minds. Giving voice to that thought on TV when there are so many other thoughts that could have been expressed really shows just how high up in their thoughts it is. OBs don't want to juggle another liability (and I don't blame them) and since the informational support component that doulas provide can help parents to ask more questions and use their right to informed consent, it can make liability protection seem harder for OBs.
Personally, I didn't think the spot was horrible, just a bit biased to the idea that patients should just "trust their doctor and nurse" rather than becoming informed and advocating for their birth and baby's health. Ideally we could all trust all careproviders, but it is naive to think that they don't have motives that may not match our own. Any doula worth her massage oil should be able to navigate facilitating discussions between care providers and expecting couples so that everyone is heard and options are discussed in a manner that keeps the birth environment calm and positive. The doula should do everything possible to keep her short term relationship with the nurses and OBs harmonious. When everyone is doing their job well, it is not even an issue and a doula and careprovider will mutually benefit one another. We are not natural adversaries, but have actually been hired by the same people as a part of a team.
The newscast also brought up repeatedly how dangerous labor can become at any second which is a message we could use a bit less of I think. I wish the stats that show less c-sections, less interventions and higher satisfaction with birth experiences should definitely have been brought up.
Great article, less great TV spot, feel free to read my comment below as to why....
I find it funny that one of the OB's main comments focused on liability. "If something goes wrong, who is liable?" (meaning between the doula, parents or doctor) Liability is definitely an issue at the heart of so many of the problems in maternity care and certainly at the top of most OBs minds. Giving voice to that thought on TV when there are so many other thoughts that could have been expressed really shows just how high up in their thoughts it is. OBs don't want to juggle another liability (and I don't blame them) and since the informational support component that doulas provide can help parents to ask more questions and use their right to informed consent, it can make liability protection seem harder for OBs.
Personally, I didn't think the spot was horrible, just a bit biased to the idea that patients should just "trust their doctor and nurse" rather than becoming informed and advocating for their birth and baby's health. Ideally we could all trust all careproviders, but it is naive to think that they don't have motives that may not match our own. Any doula worth her massage oil should be able to navigate facilitating discussions between care providers and expecting couples so that everyone is heard and options are discussed in a manner that keeps the birth environment calm and positive. The doula should do everything possible to keep her short term relationship with the nurses and OBs harmonious. When everyone is doing their job well, it is not even an issue and a doula and careprovider will mutually benefit one another. We are not natural adversaries, but have actually been hired by the same people as a part of a team.
The newscast also brought up repeatedly how dangerous labor can become at any second which is a message we could use a bit less of I think. I wish the stats that show less c-sections, less interventions and higher satisfaction with birth experiences should definitely have been brought up.
Monday, November 10, 2008
Get Something Done
Another MOPS article. This week the topic is "Get Something Done". I wrote about babywearing as a practical way to cook, run errands etc. basically as a way to get something done. Here is what I wrote:
We all love to snuggle our little ones, but let’s face it, adults sometimes need to get something done! Lots of devices exist to entertain your child, but sometimes it seems all that makes your little one happy is more of you. Using a baby carrier, or babywearing, is the perfect way to both get something done and to let your child have more of you. Research has shown the benefits of babywearing to include:
Babies cry less. Carried babies cry 43% less overall and 54% less during the evening hours.
Good for baby's mental development. Babies spend more time in a "quiet, alert state" when carried - the ideal state for learning. When carried, a baby sees the world from where you do and the extra stimulation benefits brain development.
Good for baby's emotional development. Babies are quickly able to develop security and trust when they are carried and may become independent earlier.
Moms (and dads) report these practical benefits to babywearing:
Do housework, run errands or cook dinner all while keeping your child happy
Breastfeed hands-free while on the phone or shopping
No need to lug around a heavy car seat or stroller
Most baby carriers fit in your diaper bag so are easy to transport
Saves $ and the environment because less baby products are needed
These days there are so many cute baby carriers that a sling or wrap is not only very practical, but it can also make a hip fashion statement. Babywearing is not just for babies either; I still wear my 30lb toddler!
For resources on buying or using baby carriers:peppermint.com or thebabywearer.com
We all love to snuggle our little ones, but let’s face it, adults sometimes need to get something done! Lots of devices exist to entertain your child, but sometimes it seems all that makes your little one happy is more of you. Using a baby carrier, or babywearing, is the perfect way to both get something done and to let your child have more of you. Research has shown the benefits of babywearing to include:
Babies cry less. Carried babies cry 43% less overall and 54% less during the evening hours.
Good for baby's mental development. Babies spend more time in a "quiet, alert state" when carried - the ideal state for learning. When carried, a baby sees the world from where you do and the extra stimulation benefits brain development.
Good for baby's emotional development. Babies are quickly able to develop security and trust when they are carried and may become independent earlier.
Moms (and dads) report these practical benefits to babywearing:
Do housework, run errands or cook dinner all while keeping your child happy
Breastfeed hands-free while on the phone or shopping
No need to lug around a heavy car seat or stroller
Most baby carriers fit in your diaper bag so are easy to transport
Saves $ and the environment because less baby products are needed
These days there are so many cute baby carriers that a sling or wrap is not only very practical, but it can also make a hip fashion statement. Babywearing is not just for babies either; I still wear my 30lb toddler!
For resources on buying or using baby carriers:peppermint.com or thebabywearer.com
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Me, a hypocrite?
Lately I have been reading a lot of the Cochrane reports on all types of medically related stuff. These reports represent the most unbiased, comprehensive analysis of evidenced based medicine that exists. Not just birth related stuff, all sorts of health issues. The Cochrane Institute is a great resource.
But reading these reports has me thinking. I often gripe (mostly to Super B) about how I wish OBs would practice evidenced based medicine and I get frusterated when I see them recommending things that are proven to pose risk to moms and babies with little to no advantage to be gained.
However, in the normal birth camp, we often talk about recommending chiros, accupuncture to induce labor, evening primrose oil to prep the cervix, rasberry leaf tea for uterine toning, even moxbustion to turn a breech baby. According to the Cochrane Reports most of these practices are about as evidenced based as constant fetal monitoring, which means, not at all. Now some of that doesn't shock me, I never have been able to fully swallow that burning an herb on your big toe (mox) causes baby to flip. To be fair though, constant fetal monitoring carries a fair degree of risk to mom and baby whereas a little tea never hurt anyone. But still, neither appear to be evidenced based.
So I am a hypocrite, right? I get miffed that OBs routinely recommend stuff that is clearly not evidence based, yet I have chiros and places to buy herbs listed in my doula notebook. In some ways I wonder if we are not both doing some of the same thing - which is basically working from the worldview we know and in which we are most comfortable. I honestly find myself pretty comfortable sitting between a healthy skepticism and openess to each group, but looking at it from the perspective of differing, rather than competing, worldviews makes me more comfortable walking a mile in the shoes of someone else's thinking.
But reading these reports has me thinking. I often gripe (mostly to Super B) about how I wish OBs would practice evidenced based medicine and I get frusterated when I see them recommending things that are proven to pose risk to moms and babies with little to no advantage to be gained.
However, in the normal birth camp, we often talk about recommending chiros, accupuncture to induce labor, evening primrose oil to prep the cervix, rasberry leaf tea for uterine toning, even moxbustion to turn a breech baby. According to the Cochrane Reports most of these practices are about as evidenced based as constant fetal monitoring, which means, not at all. Now some of that doesn't shock me, I never have been able to fully swallow that burning an herb on your big toe (mox) causes baby to flip. To be fair though, constant fetal monitoring carries a fair degree of risk to mom and baby whereas a little tea never hurt anyone. But still, neither appear to be evidenced based.
So I am a hypocrite, right? I get miffed that OBs routinely recommend stuff that is clearly not evidence based, yet I have chiros and places to buy herbs listed in my doula notebook. In some ways I wonder if we are not both doing some of the same thing - which is basically working from the worldview we know and in which we are most comfortable. I honestly find myself pretty comfortable sitting between a healthy skepticism and openess to each group, but looking at it from the perspective of differing, rather than competing, worldviews makes me more comfortable walking a mile in the shoes of someone else's thinking.
Friday, October 10, 2008
MOPs article-natural ways to deal with being sick
(I am writing little articles for my MOPs newsletters, so I thought I would just cut and paste these articles into my blog as I have the time. This is a copy of the third one I have written and it is about natural ways to deal with common illness. Please know that these are very short descriptions, I only have an allowance of about 300 words! This article is written to go along with the speaker, a local ped, talk entitled "The Five Most Common Questions A Pediatrician is Asked".)
Tired of eating an apple a day? Here are some ideas for natural remedies to common health issues. You might find you can avoid a few trips to the pediatrician and most are cheaper than a co-pay. (Everything I list can be bought at Walmart.)
1.Warm olive oil and mix with raw, crushed garlic. Pour a small amount into sore or infected ear. Garlic is antibacterial and the warm oil soothes the ear pain.
2.A washcloth soaked in lavender oil and water can be placed on a tummy or head to help relieve pain. Lavender oil is calming, so it can be helpful in soothing a child who needs to stay calm for further treatment, ie a splinter removal.
3.Peppermint oil can be smelled to relieve nausea.
4.Fill a clean sock half way with rice and knot the top. Heat in the microwave and use sock as a heating pad for boo boos, cramps and earaches. No outlet necessary.
5.Netti pot- Relieves allergies and sinus issues without medication.
6.Boil a few tablespoons of grated ginger and let steep for an hour. Add honey or sweetener of your choice, and drink as tea to help with nausea. Doing the same with fresh parsley helps bring down swelling and high blood pressure.
7.An effective heartburn remedy is drinking an ounce of Apple Cider Vinegar. This does not taste good, so take it like a shot.
8.Apply duct tape over an unwanted wart. Leave on continually, replacing the tape as needed. The wart usually disappears in a week or two.
9.Arnica and tea tree oil can both be used topically instead of antibacterial cream. Arnica not only fights infection, it takes the pain out of a cut, and reduces swelling and bruising.
Tired of eating an apple a day? Here are some ideas for natural remedies to common health issues. You might find you can avoid a few trips to the pediatrician and most are cheaper than a co-pay. (Everything I list can be bought at Walmart.)
1.Warm olive oil and mix with raw, crushed garlic. Pour a small amount into sore or infected ear. Garlic is antibacterial and the warm oil soothes the ear pain.
2.A washcloth soaked in lavender oil and water can be placed on a tummy or head to help relieve pain. Lavender oil is calming, so it can be helpful in soothing a child who needs to stay calm for further treatment, ie a splinter removal.
3.Peppermint oil can be smelled to relieve nausea.
4.Fill a clean sock half way with rice and knot the top. Heat in the microwave and use sock as a heating pad for boo boos, cramps and earaches. No outlet necessary.
5.Netti pot- Relieves allergies and sinus issues without medication.
6.Boil a few tablespoons of grated ginger and let steep for an hour. Add honey or sweetener of your choice, and drink as tea to help with nausea. Doing the same with fresh parsley helps bring down swelling and high blood pressure.
7.An effective heartburn remedy is drinking an ounce of Apple Cider Vinegar. This does not taste good, so take it like a shot.
8.Apply duct tape over an unwanted wart. Leave on continually, replacing the tape as needed. The wart usually disappears in a week or two.
9.Arnica and tea tree oil can both be used topically instead of antibacterial cream. Arnica not only fights infection, it takes the pain out of a cut, and reduces swelling and bruising.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
A tale of two births
I have attended two births this week and I don't think I could have gone to two births that differed so radically from each other. In fact, they were so different, it is almost hard to beleive that the two events were a demonstration of the same biological process.
A few days ago I attended a beautiful homebirth that happened very quickly. Baby was born into his fathers arms after only a few hours of labor. Mom labored in a birth tub under dim lightening. She drank a rasberry smoothie and was offered other snacks. Don't get me wrong, it was a beautiful birth, but mom wasn't just sitting there having a day at the local spa. She contracted hard and moaned and all the other things laboring moms tend to do as baby is coming down. The midwife there listened to the baby's heart beat a few times, did some perenium support and made some"you go girl" comments, but otherwise her main duty during this birth was to hold the flashlight so the dad could catch the baby underwater. (And please know I am not minimizing a homebirth midwife's role at a birth. The midwife is the guard that watches for issues and knows both how to prevent and take care of them should they arise so that the role of flashlight bearer is even a possibility.)
Yesterday I attended another birth. After 24 hours of hard labor, mom delivered her baby into the arms of a surgeon she had never met before under the harsh lights of a surgical suite. In the prior 24 hours she had 9 different wires going into or out of her. She was stuck10 times with needles, denied food and even water despite having lips that were cracking from dryness. Various strangers walked into the room without knocking. She was touched and examined by countless and mostly nameless staff. She was made to lay completely still on her back even though she asked to sit up and to walk so that baby could use gravity to help bring him down. Eventually she was told her food and gravity deprived body was not capable of birthing the baby, and that the baby was in trouble. Then she was left alone (well with just me anyway) for over two hours waiting to have the baby that was in such immediate distress "saved" by surgery.
I admit I do like homebirths and I think the statistics are clear that homebirth is far safer for most women and their babies, but I am not saying one was good b/c it was at home or that one was bad because it was at the hospital. I have been to rather unpleasant homebirths as well. I am also not saying that all the interventions in the second birth were unnecessary, because I simply don't know. I tend to think most were and the ones that weren't necessary probably created the need for the other ones but regardless, the outcome could have been the same. Actually. I don't know if I am really saying anything at all, except that I have gotten 3 hours of sleep in the last 50 plus hours and feeling down after a lousy birth.
The fact of the matter is that the second birth discribes how most births occur in this country. Maybe not with the major abdominal surgery at the end (though with a 30-50% c-section rate at most area hospitals, that is the way it will be soon enough), but with the wires and nameless strangers in and out while mom is confined to the bed. I can't help but believe though if you put the right ingredients together, you can tip the odds in favor of things being different....better. I thnk the right ingredients start with empathy, willingness to respect mom as an individual and most of all a basic trust that God's design is a good one that man shouldn't mess with until a good reason comes along.
A few days ago I attended a beautiful homebirth that happened very quickly. Baby was born into his fathers arms after only a few hours of labor. Mom labored in a birth tub under dim lightening. She drank a rasberry smoothie and was offered other snacks. Don't get me wrong, it was a beautiful birth, but mom wasn't just sitting there having a day at the local spa. She contracted hard and moaned and all the other things laboring moms tend to do as baby is coming down. The midwife there listened to the baby's heart beat a few times, did some perenium support and made some"you go girl" comments, but otherwise her main duty during this birth was to hold the flashlight so the dad could catch the baby underwater. (And please know I am not minimizing a homebirth midwife's role at a birth. The midwife is the guard that watches for issues and knows both how to prevent and take care of them should they arise so that the role of flashlight bearer is even a possibility.)
Yesterday I attended another birth. After 24 hours of hard labor, mom delivered her baby into the arms of a surgeon she had never met before under the harsh lights of a surgical suite. In the prior 24 hours she had 9 different wires going into or out of her. She was stuck10 times with needles, denied food and even water despite having lips that were cracking from dryness. Various strangers walked into the room without knocking. She was touched and examined by countless and mostly nameless staff. She was made to lay completely still on her back even though she asked to sit up and to walk so that baby could use gravity to help bring him down. Eventually she was told her food and gravity deprived body was not capable of birthing the baby, and that the baby was in trouble. Then she was left alone (well with just me anyway) for over two hours waiting to have the baby that was in such immediate distress "saved" by surgery.
I admit I do like homebirths and I think the statistics are clear that homebirth is far safer for most women and their babies, but I am not saying one was good b/c it was at home or that one was bad because it was at the hospital. I have been to rather unpleasant homebirths as well. I am also not saying that all the interventions in the second birth were unnecessary, because I simply don't know. I tend to think most were and the ones that weren't necessary probably created the need for the other ones but regardless, the outcome could have been the same. Actually. I don't know if I am really saying anything at all, except that I have gotten 3 hours of sleep in the last 50 plus hours and feeling down after a lousy birth.
The fact of the matter is that the second birth discribes how most births occur in this country. Maybe not with the major abdominal surgery at the end (though with a 30-50% c-section rate at most area hospitals, that is the way it will be soon enough), but with the wires and nameless strangers in and out while mom is confined to the bed. I can't help but believe though if you put the right ingredients together, you can tip the odds in favor of things being different....better. I thnk the right ingredients start with empathy, willingness to respect mom as an individual and most of all a basic trust that God's design is a good one that man shouldn't mess with until a good reason comes along.
Friday, September 19, 2008
I just looked out the window and my daughter is sitting in our backyard's Texas style tree (meaning small) having a snack and reading a book. Life is funny. That is exactly what I used to do when I was a young girl, the only difference is that the trees I climbed back home were larger and thus I probably scared my parents more when I climbed up them, especially with a book in hand. Bean is only a few feet off the ground, so a fall would not even scratch her, let alone require a bandaid.
I still like to read outside, so I guess not much changes and all that reading and sitting in trees must have been passed down in the genes!
I still like to read outside, so I guess not much changes and all that reading and sitting in trees must have been passed down in the genes!
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Slings rule... Sarah Palin revisited
On the other hand, you gotta love a mom who wears her baby. What can I say, I am a women conflicted.
Sarah Palin
While I love a good political conversation, I just don't even know where to start when considering Sarah Palin. My first thought was that she was a good pick, merely because she is a woman and I generally cheer for the home team. Then more logical thinking kicked in and I became aware that she has a 4 month old. Let me repeat that....a 4 month old! I have had three 4 month olds in my tenure as a mom, and not once would I have been capable of being a Governor, never mind VP of the United States. Maybe this says more about my incompetencies as a mom than anything about Sarah Palin, but I doubt it.
I am definitely a Christian, and perhaps I agree with Sarah Palin on many policy issues; though perhaps not since I don't usually fall neatly into typical right wing conservative Christian ideology. I honestly don't know what Sarah Palin and I agree on because I stopped wanting to vote for her when I heard she had a 4 month old.
By all appearances McCain has made a wise political move. Unfortunately, his new political pawn represents a worldview that I can't buy into. In an effort to win a pro-family political debate and to shore McCain up as a supporter of a pro-family agenda, we sacrifice Sarah Palin's family and perhaps set a bad precedent for future parents. The message being sent to females by conservative Christians backing McCain/Palin is, “It’s ok to sacrifice your family on the altar of your high powered career; just don’t have an abortion.” (quote from Voddie Baucham) How pro-family is that? McCain has proven with his VP pick only that he is pro-victory, not pro-family. In fact, I contend that Sarah Palin is an anti-family pick and I don't want my daughter (or son!) emulating her.
I am definitely a Christian, and perhaps I agree with Sarah Palin on many policy issues; though perhaps not since I don't usually fall neatly into typical right wing conservative Christian ideology. I honestly don't know what Sarah Palin and I agree on because I stopped wanting to vote for her when I heard she had a 4 month old.
By all appearances McCain has made a wise political move. Unfortunately, his new political pawn represents a worldview that I can't buy into. In an effort to win a pro-family political debate and to shore McCain up as a supporter of a pro-family agenda, we sacrifice Sarah Palin's family and perhaps set a bad precedent for future parents. The message being sent to females by conservative Christians backing McCain/Palin is, “It’s ok to sacrifice your family on the altar of your high powered career; just don’t have an abortion.” (quote from Voddie Baucham) How pro-family is that? McCain has proven with his VP pick only that he is pro-victory, not pro-family. In fact, I contend that Sarah Palin is an anti-family pick and I don't want my daughter (or son!) emulating her.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Kindergarten woes
Summer is over. I just dropped the kids off at school which means today is Roo's first day of kindergarten.
I wish my gut was not screaming at me, but this just feels so wrong. I feel in every bone of my body that Roo should not be there. I do think Bean will have another great year and everything feels mostly right about her not staying home with me. As much as I also want to homeschool her, I don't have that same urgency prompting me to keep her close at the moment.
I am trying to celebrate the small good things that come out of being a mom with just one kid around. My house will stay cleaner, I can have one on one time with Boo, learn to make homemade bread and step up the quality of other homemade goods, do more with my doula business, and generally bless my home a bit more.
Oh yeah, and I guess I can start writing in my blog again!
I wish my gut was not screaming at me, but this just feels so wrong. I feel in every bone of my body that Roo should not be there. I do think Bean will have another great year and everything feels mostly right about her not staying home with me. As much as I also want to homeschool her, I don't have that same urgency prompting me to keep her close at the moment.
I am trying to celebrate the small good things that come out of being a mom with just one kid around. My house will stay cleaner, I can have one on one time with Boo, learn to make homemade bread and step up the quality of other homemade goods, do more with my doula business, and generally bless my home a bit more.
Oh yeah, and I guess I can start writing in my blog again!
Sunday, June 22, 2008
High School Musical on Review
This weekend my daughter and I are visiting my grandmother who lives in Virginia. Basically since she is 90 years old we have just decided that the best way to get in a good visit is to bring one kiddo at a time and try to just have a low key weekend. So in that vein, Nana thought it would be fun to rent a movie and eat ice cream. Now, we don't really watch TV and Bean has certainly not watched a lot of movies, but she did think she might want to see High School Muscial 2.
With mixed emotions and trepidation I allowed her to rent the movie, this probably occuring not out of the generosity of my heart but b/c everything else that looked remotely watchable seemed to have already been checked out.
First of all, I have to join every pubescent girl in saying, well, that Zac Efron is a mighty attractive fellow. Second of all, I now have several High School musical tunes seriously stuck in my head, and I do feel a bit like dancing. Pretty catchy stuff really. But I still have mixed feelings on the approprietness of a 7 year old watching the film.
Starting with the good stuff, beyond Efron's blue eyes of course:
*no bad language, one use of the word stupid though which is considered off limits at our house
*pretty good morals taught, ie be true to your friends, be kind to others, keep your word
*teens are seen as going to their parents for advice
*while the clothes worn are not as modest as I would prefer, the girls for the most part are not dressed like hoochie mamas
*three super short kisses and no sexual allusions in the slightest
*fun dancing without sexualization
The bad stuff:
*romance theme is not necessary for 7 year olds (actually I should write this about 50 times b/c it is my biggy, why would a 1st grader need to be watching anything about high schoolers and romance?)
*overally made up females dressed in a very trendy way which I don't want wish my daughter to asprire to
*my own slightly bizarre distrust of anything too mainstream (if I had a smiley icon I would enter it here as I am making fun of myself)
It seems as I type this out that I should probably not add letting my daugher watch High School Musical to my bad parenting list. We ate some ice cream, hung out with Nana, and will probably be singing together the next few days. Thankfully it is just me at the moment that has a small crush on Efron, but all the same, I will not be rushing out to get High School Musical 3 should that movie get made.
With mixed emotions and trepidation I allowed her to rent the movie, this probably occuring not out of the generosity of my heart but b/c everything else that looked remotely watchable seemed to have already been checked out.
First of all, I have to join every pubescent girl in saying, well, that Zac Efron is a mighty attractive fellow. Second of all, I now have several High School musical tunes seriously stuck in my head, and I do feel a bit like dancing. Pretty catchy stuff really. But I still have mixed feelings on the approprietness of a 7 year old watching the film.
Starting with the good stuff, beyond Efron's blue eyes of course:
*no bad language, one use of the word stupid though which is considered off limits at our house
*pretty good morals taught, ie be true to your friends, be kind to others, keep your word
*teens are seen as going to their parents for advice
*while the clothes worn are not as modest as I would prefer, the girls for the most part are not dressed like hoochie mamas
*three super short kisses and no sexual allusions in the slightest
*fun dancing without sexualization
The bad stuff:
*romance theme is not necessary for 7 year olds (actually I should write this about 50 times b/c it is my biggy, why would a 1st grader need to be watching anything about high schoolers and romance?)
*overally made up females dressed in a very trendy way which I don't want wish my daughter to asprire to
*my own slightly bizarre distrust of anything too mainstream (if I had a smiley icon I would enter it here as I am making fun of myself)
It seems as I type this out that I should probably not add letting my daugher watch High School Musical to my bad parenting list. We ate some ice cream, hung out with Nana, and will probably be singing together the next few days. Thankfully it is just me at the moment that has a small crush on Efron, but all the same, I will not be rushing out to get High School Musical 3 should that movie get made.
Friday, May 23, 2008
Me, the farmer
Here are some pics of me making my new organic garden and what the final garden looks like. I have no idea if it will actually produce anything, but I am quite proud of myself for being able to make it! My smallest child has already picked a lot of the basil but I hoping it is hardy enough to survive a toddler.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Boys rock!
I don't give parenting advice, those of you who know me and my children can probably understand why!
However, if I were to give parenting advice, here is my best gem for parents of boys:
NEVER take parenting advice from someone who doesn't have boys.
Stand there and listen and smile politely, but in your mind picture yourself holding your fingers in your ears and repeating "I can't hear you, I can't hear you."
Then go give your boy(s) a big 'ole mama hug. Boys are messy and boys like to pretend to shot things and sometimes they use tools when and where they shouldn't (at least one of mine does!). But they are some kind of cute and some kind of sweet and it is OK that they don't always act like girls. Boys rock!
However, if I were to give parenting advice, here is my best gem for parents of boys:
NEVER take parenting advice from someone who doesn't have boys.
Stand there and listen and smile politely, but in your mind picture yourself holding your fingers in your ears and repeating "I can't hear you, I can't hear you."
Then go give your boy(s) a big 'ole mama hug. Boys are messy and boys like to pretend to shot things and sometimes they use tools when and where they shouldn't (at least one of mine does!). But they are some kind of cute and some kind of sweet and it is OK that they don't always act like girls. Boys rock!
Friday, May 9, 2008
Feeling nostalgic
I saw another child born into the world this week. Each time is so amazing. I came home that night and lay in bed and snuggled with my now rather big Roo and soaked up his still sweet smelling 5 year old scent. How blessed I am to be a part of these little peoples' life. From the newest baby held in my arms, to the big kid taking up most of my bed, it is such an awesome priviledge.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Yarnharlot on children
I did not write this commentary, though I agree whole heartedly. This note appeared at the Yarnharlots's blog (which I had never heard of before!) and was forwarded to me by a friend. I liked what Yarnharlot, whomever she may be, wrote so much I am going to quote her here:
Yarnharlot said:
I believe that children are people. I believe that as people, they have a right to be anywhere that people have a right to be. I also believe that some babies/children/mothers are inseparable and that that is how it should be for them. We've got the only culture on earth - or in the history of humans that actually segregates adults and children, and it's really hard on those of us who have little children who feel in their bones that they should be with their mothers. These mothers then have to choose between meeting the needs of their kids, or missing everything for years and years, and I think that really sucks, and discourages mothers from doing what is right for their particular little one. If a kid isn't ready to be without their mother (or the other way around) and there is an ever increasing list of places that babies/toddlers/children aren't welcome...then what's a woman to do....curtail every aspect of her life for years?
That said, I also think that children disrupting something is pretty sucky too. I've been at movies or plays or something like that where a child wasn't happy and nine times out of ten, the mum high-tailed it out or went to the back as soon as she realized that her kid wasn't into the scene. The tenth time, maybe she didn't, but I still cut her some slack because I understand that it might be the only time she's left the house in two weeks, and leaving the house is really hard, and maybe the only thing standing between her and taking up chewing on sticks from the park as a hobby, and because maybe the first step toward decent child care, maternity leave and ethical treatment of parents and families is actually accepting THAT CHILDREN EXIST and are so far, the only way we have found (despite them being loud, dirty and occasionally too damp for my personal taste) to continue the species.
Saying babies/toddlers/children are welcome as they need to be, however, does mean that every once in a while there is going to be a happy kid who makes too much noise or a mum who fails to recognize that her child is being disruptive (seriously, it's like becoming snow-blind. Mothers can't always see it - I assure you that getting 3 hours of broken sleep a night can mess with your judgement.) or there might even be an unhappy kid who was predicted to do well and doesn't, and instead uses the time to finely hone their impression of demon spawn, and those kids are going to be a pain in the arse....Just like some other people we are all going to meet in our day (I am keeping a list) that are a pain in the arse that we don't have the right to get rid of either. I know these occasionally loud kids are going to get on your nerves, and sometimes mine too, but I'm begging, on behalf of mothers everywhere, to approach these baby/toddler friendly events with a little tolerance and gentleness for these inexperienced little people and those who are trying to both have a life, and keep the peace.
Yarnharlot said:
I believe that children are people. I believe that as people, they have a right to be anywhere that people have a right to be. I also believe that some babies/children/mothers are inseparable and that that is how it should be for them. We've got the only culture on earth - or in the history of humans that actually segregates adults and children, and it's really hard on those of us who have little children who feel in their bones that they should be with their mothers. These mothers then have to choose between meeting the needs of their kids, or missing everything for years and years, and I think that really sucks, and discourages mothers from doing what is right for their particular little one. If a kid isn't ready to be without their mother (or the other way around) and there is an ever increasing list of places that babies/toddlers/children aren't welcome...then what's a woman to do....curtail every aspect of her life for years?
That said, I also think that children disrupting something is pretty sucky too. I've been at movies or plays or something like that where a child wasn't happy and nine times out of ten, the mum high-tailed it out or went to the back as soon as she realized that her kid wasn't into the scene. The tenth time, maybe she didn't, but I still cut her some slack because I understand that it might be the only time she's left the house in two weeks, and leaving the house is really hard, and maybe the only thing standing between her and taking up chewing on sticks from the park as a hobby, and because maybe the first step toward decent child care, maternity leave and ethical treatment of parents and families is actually accepting THAT CHILDREN EXIST and are so far, the only way we have found (despite them being loud, dirty and occasionally too damp for my personal taste) to continue the species.
Saying babies/toddlers/children are welcome as they need to be, however, does mean that every once in a while there is going to be a happy kid who makes too much noise or a mum who fails to recognize that her child is being disruptive (seriously, it's like becoming snow-blind. Mothers can't always see it - I assure you that getting 3 hours of broken sleep a night can mess with your judgement.) or there might even be an unhappy kid who was predicted to do well and doesn't, and instead uses the time to finely hone their impression of demon spawn, and those kids are going to be a pain in the arse....Just like some other people we are all going to meet in our day (I am keeping a list) that are a pain in the arse that we don't have the right to get rid of either. I know these occasionally loud kids are going to get on your nerves, and sometimes mine too, but I'm begging, on behalf of mothers everywhere, to approach these baby/toddler friendly events with a little tolerance and gentleness for these inexperienced little people and those who are trying to both have a life, and keep the peace.
Friday, April 25, 2008
The Crazy Family
We are officially the "crazy" family at our daughter's elementary school. I am sure this won't surprise that many of you, but I guess we didn't stand out there until recently. Or maybe we did and I just didn't realize it until now.
So every year the school, like schools acorss America, has a field day where the kids get to play all kinds of fun games outside. I loved field day as a child and I love watching my daughter do field day now. This is no knock on field day. At Bean's school everyone also orders t-shirts to commemorate the event in colors that correspond with each child's grade. Everyone wears them on the day and the school looks like a floating sea of purple, red, green etc. as each grade moves from event to event.
Last year I did not order Bean one. We did not need a t-shirt, I thought it was a bit of a waste and threw the form in the recyling bin. No one from the school said anything but on the day of the event Bean was given one b/c apparently not having a t-shirt is not OK. This year I did not order one either. But this year I got a very kind email from the room mom expressing how concerned she was that Bean might be the only one in the school without a t-shirt. At this point I asked Bean if she wanted a t-shirt. I would hate to give my daughter a complex she will have to pay to see a therapist for when she is an adult. Bean did not want a t-shirt, and making me proud, she said she would just recylcle last year's shirt insteading of wasting the earth's resources.
Another email was exchanged once again encouraging the purchase of a t-shirt. At some point in the various email exchanges I am told the color is purple. Upon learning the shirt was purple I knew Bean would want it. Purple is her absolutely, positively, most favorite color in the whole, wide world. So more email was exchanged insuring we could still order the shirt at this late date. I left the final choice up to Bean though; I sent her to school this morning with the money and told her to do what she thought best. I still don't know if we will be receiving the shirt or not. Though I expect more email if we are not.
So how did this perfectly cute field day t-shirt turn me into the crazy mom?? Why am I am the only one thinking that the school has 400 kids, so 400 t-shirts, every year? How much oil is used to grow that cotton, manufacter those t-shirts, and transport them to suburbia? How many soldiers died in Iraq for that oil so my kid can look perfectly coordinated on field day? And don't even get me started on the child slave labor in some country like Honduras where the shirts were probably made anyway. The ironic thing is that the kids just did a 6 week segment on the rain forest and how it is important to save the earth. I guess not important enough to just reuse your field day t-shirt from last year.
Yes, we are the crazy family.
So every year the school, like schools acorss America, has a field day where the kids get to play all kinds of fun games outside. I loved field day as a child and I love watching my daughter do field day now. This is no knock on field day. At Bean's school everyone also orders t-shirts to commemorate the event in colors that correspond with each child's grade. Everyone wears them on the day and the school looks like a floating sea of purple, red, green etc. as each grade moves from event to event.
Last year I did not order Bean one. We did not need a t-shirt, I thought it was a bit of a waste and threw the form in the recyling bin. No one from the school said anything but on the day of the event Bean was given one b/c apparently not having a t-shirt is not OK. This year I did not order one either. But this year I got a very kind email from the room mom expressing how concerned she was that Bean might be the only one in the school without a t-shirt. At this point I asked Bean if she wanted a t-shirt. I would hate to give my daughter a complex she will have to pay to see a therapist for when she is an adult. Bean did not want a t-shirt, and making me proud, she said she would just recylcle last year's shirt insteading of wasting the earth's resources.
Another email was exchanged once again encouraging the purchase of a t-shirt. At some point in the various email exchanges I am told the color is purple. Upon learning the shirt was purple I knew Bean would want it. Purple is her absolutely, positively, most favorite color in the whole, wide world. So more email was exchanged insuring we could still order the shirt at this late date. I left the final choice up to Bean though; I sent her to school this morning with the money and told her to do what she thought best. I still don't know if we will be receiving the shirt or not. Though I expect more email if we are not.
So how did this perfectly cute field day t-shirt turn me into the crazy mom?? Why am I am the only one thinking that the school has 400 kids, so 400 t-shirts, every year? How much oil is used to grow that cotton, manufacter those t-shirts, and transport them to suburbia? How many soldiers died in Iraq for that oil so my kid can look perfectly coordinated on field day? And don't even get me started on the child slave labor in some country like Honduras where the shirts were probably made anyway. The ironic thing is that the kids just did a 6 week segment on the rain forest and how it is important to save the earth. I guess not important enough to just reuse your field day t-shirt from last year.
Yes, we are the crazy family.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
If you gotta clean, clean it right.
List of natural cleaning supplies and mixes that I often use. I did not write all of this but wanted to compile a list so I can do an article on natural cleaning for my MOPs presentations next year.
Basic supplies, many you probably already have in the pantry are:
Baking Soda
Baking soda is made from soda ash and is slightly alkaline (its pH is around 8.1; 7 is neutral). It neutralizes acid-based odors in water and adsorbs odors from the air. Baking soda can be used as a gentle, nonabrasive cleanser for kitchen countertops, sinks, bathtubs, ovens, and fiberglass.
Washing Soda
Similar to baking soda, washing soda (sodium carbonate) is much more strongly alkaline, with a pH around 11. It releases no harmful fumes and is far safer than a commercial solvent formula. Washing soda cuts grease, cleans petroleum oil, removes wax or lipstick, and neutralizes odors in the same way as baking soda. Washing soda is found at some supermarkets in the laundry section. (only Kroger carries it around here)
Vinegar
Vinegar kills bacteria, mold, and germs. It is the opposite of baking and washing soda; it is acidic and therefore neutralizes alkaline or caustic substances. A straight 5 percent solution of vinegar kills 99 percent of bacteria, 82 percent of mold, and 80 percent of germs (viruses).
Soap vs Detergent
Both soaps and detergents are washing compounds that mix with grease and water. Soaps are made of materials found in nature, detergents are synthetic. There is little doubt that soap is better for your health and the environment than detergents. Detergents are very toxic to fish and wildlife. However, washing with soap has a big drawback, in that it reacts with the minerals in water and leaves an insoluble film (ie soap scum). Detergents react less to minerals in water and thus are the product of choice for laundry. You can ensure the least possible damage to the environment by selecting the most biodegradable products. Or you can make you own laundry soap with washing soda.
Mold killers and Tea Tree Oil
There are 3 natural ingredients that kill mold: tea tree oil (can be bought at Walmart), grapefruit seed extract, and vinegar. Vinegar is by far the cheapest. Tea tree oil is more expensive, but it is a broad-spectrum fungicide and kills all the mold families it contacts. Grapefruit seed extract cost more, but has no smell, unlike TTO which has a strong scent.
Now what you can do with these supplies:
Creamy Soft Scrubber
½ cup baking soda
liquid detergent
Pour the baking soda into a bowl and add enough liquid detergent to give the mixture the texture of frosting. Scoop it onto a sponge to wash surfaces. This is the perfect recipe for cleaning the bathtub.
Window Cleaner
1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon liquid detergent
3 tablespoons vinegar
2 cups water
Put all the ingredients in a spray bottle, shake it, and use as you would a commercial brand.
Oven Cleaner
1 cup or more baking soda
water
squirt or two of liquid detergent
Sprinkle water generously over the bottom of the oven, then cover the grime with enough baking soda that the surface is totally white. Sprinkle more water over the top. Let the mixture set overnight. You can easily wipe up the grease the next morning because the grime will have loosened.
All-Purpose Spray Cleaner
1/2 teaspoon washing soda
dab of liquid soap
2 cups hot tap water
Combine the ingredients in a spray bottle and shake until the washing soda has dissolved. Apply and wipe off with a sponge or rag.
Furniture Polish
1/2 teaspoon oil, such as olive
1/4 cup vinegar or fresh lemon juice
Mix the ingredients in a glass jar. Dab a soft rag into the solution and wipe wood surfaces. Cover the glass jar and store indefinitely.
Add water to make this a wood floor cleaner.
Vinegar Deodorizer
Keep clean spray bottles filled with straight 5 percent vinegar in your kitchen near your cutting board and in your bathroom, and use for general cleaning.
Mold Killers #1
2 teaspoons tea tree oil
2 cups water
Combine tea tree oil and water in a spray bottle, shake to blend, and use to clean. Do not rinse. Leave in the bottle-it has a long shelf life.
Mold Killer 2:
citrus Seed Extract, 20 drops
2 cups water
Combine the citrus seed extract and water in a spray bottle, shake to blend, and use to clean. Do not rinse. This also has a long shelf life.
Mold Killer 3:
Straight vinegar reportedly kills 82 percent of mold. Pour some white distilled vinegar into a spray bottle and apply to moldy areas. Let set without rinsing, if you can put up with the smell, which will subside in a few hours.
Basic supplies, many you probably already have in the pantry are:
Baking Soda
Baking soda is made from soda ash and is slightly alkaline (its pH is around 8.1; 7 is neutral). It neutralizes acid-based odors in water and adsorbs odors from the air. Baking soda can be used as a gentle, nonabrasive cleanser for kitchen countertops, sinks, bathtubs, ovens, and fiberglass.
Washing Soda
Similar to baking soda, washing soda (sodium carbonate) is much more strongly alkaline, with a pH around 11. It releases no harmful fumes and is far safer than a commercial solvent formula. Washing soda cuts grease, cleans petroleum oil, removes wax or lipstick, and neutralizes odors in the same way as baking soda. Washing soda is found at some supermarkets in the laundry section. (only Kroger carries it around here)
Vinegar
Vinegar kills bacteria, mold, and germs. It is the opposite of baking and washing soda; it is acidic and therefore neutralizes alkaline or caustic substances. A straight 5 percent solution of vinegar kills 99 percent of bacteria, 82 percent of mold, and 80 percent of germs (viruses).
Soap vs Detergent
Both soaps and detergents are washing compounds that mix with grease and water. Soaps are made of materials found in nature, detergents are synthetic. There is little doubt that soap is better for your health and the environment than detergents. Detergents are very toxic to fish and wildlife. However, washing with soap has a big drawback, in that it reacts with the minerals in water and leaves an insoluble film (ie soap scum). Detergents react less to minerals in water and thus are the product of choice for laundry. You can ensure the least possible damage to the environment by selecting the most biodegradable products. Or you can make you own laundry soap with washing soda.
Mold killers and Tea Tree Oil
There are 3 natural ingredients that kill mold: tea tree oil (can be bought at Walmart), grapefruit seed extract, and vinegar. Vinegar is by far the cheapest. Tea tree oil is more expensive, but it is a broad-spectrum fungicide and kills all the mold families it contacts. Grapefruit seed extract cost more, but has no smell, unlike TTO which has a strong scent.
Now what you can do with these supplies:
Creamy Soft Scrubber
½ cup baking soda
liquid detergent
Pour the baking soda into a bowl and add enough liquid detergent to give the mixture the texture of frosting. Scoop it onto a sponge to wash surfaces. This is the perfect recipe for cleaning the bathtub.
Window Cleaner
1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon liquid detergent
3 tablespoons vinegar
2 cups water
Put all the ingredients in a spray bottle, shake it, and use as you would a commercial brand.
Oven Cleaner
1 cup or more baking soda
water
squirt or two of liquid detergent
Sprinkle water generously over the bottom of the oven, then cover the grime with enough baking soda that the surface is totally white. Sprinkle more water over the top. Let the mixture set overnight. You can easily wipe up the grease the next morning because the grime will have loosened.
All-Purpose Spray Cleaner
1/2 teaspoon washing soda
dab of liquid soap
2 cups hot tap water
Combine the ingredients in a spray bottle and shake until the washing soda has dissolved. Apply and wipe off with a sponge or rag.
Furniture Polish
1/2 teaspoon oil, such as olive
1/4 cup vinegar or fresh lemon juice
Mix the ingredients in a glass jar. Dab a soft rag into the solution and wipe wood surfaces. Cover the glass jar and store indefinitely.
Add water to make this a wood floor cleaner.
Vinegar Deodorizer
Keep clean spray bottles filled with straight 5 percent vinegar in your kitchen near your cutting board and in your bathroom, and use for general cleaning.
Mold Killers #1
2 teaspoons tea tree oil
2 cups water
Combine tea tree oil and water in a spray bottle, shake to blend, and use to clean. Do not rinse. Leave in the bottle-it has a long shelf life.
Mold Killer 2:
citrus Seed Extract, 20 drops
2 cups water
Combine the citrus seed extract and water in a spray bottle, shake to blend, and use to clean. Do not rinse. This also has a long shelf life.
Mold Killer 3:
Straight vinegar reportedly kills 82 percent of mold. Pour some white distilled vinegar into a spray bottle and apply to moldy areas. Let set without rinsing, if you can put up with the smell, which will subside in a few hours.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Indescribable, Uncontainable - Amazing doula moment
I have had so many amazing experiences these last few months as I have started attending births and providing doula services. One moment in particular I get to enjoy reliving because the moment was wrapped up in a beautiful song that I hear on the radio from time to time.
At this birth mom was absolutly amazing and attending to her was an honor and a pleasure. This special moment took place close to the end of labor as mom was dealing with the most intense physical strain and drawing deep from within just trusting God and his design of her body to get the job done. She was able to ask for a certain song to be played. The room was quiet except for this music, and our whispered words of encouragement and prayer. As mom swayed through a contraction the room was filled with an incredible peace as these words played: (hum it with me if you know it!)
Indescribable, uncontainable,
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name.
You are amazing God.
All powerful, untameable,
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God.
For me, it seemed time stood still as the words covered the moment. As this mother was on the verge of bringing her son into the world, it was so apparent that God certainly is indescribale, uncontainable and all powerful. When I hear this song now, I am immediatly brought back to that moment and humbled once again by how amazing God is and by how incredible it is that we get to share in the process of creating and bringing forth new life. Wow.
At this birth mom was absolutly amazing and attending to her was an honor and a pleasure. This special moment took place close to the end of labor as mom was dealing with the most intense physical strain and drawing deep from within just trusting God and his design of her body to get the job done. She was able to ask for a certain song to be played. The room was quiet except for this music, and our whispered words of encouragement and prayer. As mom swayed through a contraction the room was filled with an incredible peace as these words played: (hum it with me if you know it!)
Indescribable, uncontainable,
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name.
You are amazing God.
All powerful, untameable,
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God.
For me, it seemed time stood still as the words covered the moment. As this mother was on the verge of bringing her son into the world, it was so apparent that God certainly is indescribale, uncontainable and all powerful. When I hear this song now, I am immediatly brought back to that moment and humbled once again by how amazing God is and by how incredible it is that we get to share in the process of creating and bringing forth new life. Wow.
The trouble with Christianity
The trouble with Christianity is all us Christians. Thank goodness it is not about us and it is about Him. Man oh man, I love God, but a lot of his followers are going to send me round the bend.
I wonder if anyone else every feels this way? When I look at my life, pretty much every major hurtful word or action was spoken to me by a fellow Christian. This is applies to the past and present issues. Of course that only means that I am probably the burr in someone else's saddle, hurting them without intending to by my sheer blindness or selfishness.
Though sometimes "fellowshipping" feels a bit like middle school.
I wonder if anyone else every feels this way? When I look at my life, pretty much every major hurtful word or action was spoken to me by a fellow Christian. This is applies to the past and present issues. Of course that only means that I am probably the burr in someone else's saddle, hurting them without intending to by my sheer blindness or selfishness.
Though sometimes "fellowshipping" feels a bit like middle school.
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
You Get What You Need?
In the last few weeks I have really been pondering the idea of God meeting our needs. Is it true or does it just make us feel better to think so?
Now don't get me wrong, I beleive God will give us what we need...basically salvation. But apart from that I have decided that no, he won't, at least not all the time. Maybe even not most of the time.
I don't normally think all that negatively, so why are these thoughts even floating around my head? I have recently heard fellow Christians make the comment "I guess God just thought we needed that" or "God knew we needed such and such even when we didn't". I think right now it just sounds so hollow to me.
I remember that for every person Jesus healed, there were thousands of people that were not. If those that were healed walked around the unhealed stating that God knew what they needed and that is why they were healed, how would that make the unhealed feel? Does God not know what they need too? Christians starve everyday, Christians are tortured everyday. Clearly God doesn't meet our physical needs. Yet Christians I meet routinely proclaim stories that God met their needs by providing a friend, a good parking spot or a good deal a garage sale, etc.
I will make this more personal because I think that is the only way to tie this all together. I had a miscarriage over spring break and those of you who have read this blog or know me, know I very much want another child. Just last week another Chrisitan, whom is really a lovely person, spent a great deal of time telling me how God gave her a surprise child because God must have known she needed it. Honestly, her testimony did not help me see the glory of God, it made me feel ignored by God. I have longed for another child for years but if her logic is correct God must know I don't need another child. ( Which perhaps may be be true given my parenting skills with the ones I have, but I guess that is another story!)
I prefer to think God is just as sad as I am about the miscarriage and my inablility to have another child. I prefer not to think God doesn't care about my needs. I prefer not to be told that God cared about someone else and not me and my baby.
So maybe that is what this boils down to. I am the unhealed walking around with the healed. I am the sick leper back at the camp while the healed lepers are walking and leaping and praising God. It doesn't feel great to be the unhealed listening to the healed.
Now don't get me wrong, I beleive God will give us what we need...basically salvation. But apart from that I have decided that no, he won't, at least not all the time. Maybe even not most of the time.
I don't normally think all that negatively, so why are these thoughts even floating around my head? I have recently heard fellow Christians make the comment "I guess God just thought we needed that" or "God knew we needed such and such even when we didn't". I think right now it just sounds so hollow to me.
I remember that for every person Jesus healed, there were thousands of people that were not. If those that were healed walked around the unhealed stating that God knew what they needed and that is why they were healed, how would that make the unhealed feel? Does God not know what they need too? Christians starve everyday, Christians are tortured everyday. Clearly God doesn't meet our physical needs. Yet Christians I meet routinely proclaim stories that God met their needs by providing a friend, a good parking spot or a good deal a garage sale, etc.
I will make this more personal because I think that is the only way to tie this all together. I had a miscarriage over spring break and those of you who have read this blog or know me, know I very much want another child. Just last week another Chrisitan, whom is really a lovely person, spent a great deal of time telling me how God gave her a surprise child because God must have known she needed it. Honestly, her testimony did not help me see the glory of God, it made me feel ignored by God. I have longed for another child for years but if her logic is correct God must know I don't need another child. ( Which perhaps may be be true given my parenting skills with the ones I have, but I guess that is another story!)
I prefer to think God is just as sad as I am about the miscarriage and my inablility to have another child. I prefer not to think God doesn't care about my needs. I prefer not to be told that God cared about someone else and not me and my baby.
So maybe that is what this boils down to. I am the unhealed walking around with the healed. I am the sick leper back at the camp while the healed lepers are walking and leaping and praising God. It doesn't feel great to be the unhealed listening to the healed.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Yeah for the Zoops
I don't generally find Hathors Cow Godess stuff all that amusing (and many of you who I know read this blog may not know who Hathor is ) but this Dr. Suess style cartoon is a great little satirical sketch that I do like. I had not seen it in a while and was reminded of it the other day.
I am sure once you see the video ( it is 5 mins maybe?) you will know what she is getting at! Plus anyone who knows me at all knows that this theme is one of my areas of high opinionation!
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=LU3nYxuppVU
Yeah for the Zoops! I wish we would follow their example at the end.
I am sure once you see the video ( it is 5 mins maybe?) you will know what she is getting at! Plus anyone who knows me at all knows that this theme is one of my areas of high opinionation!
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=LU3nYxuppVU
Yeah for the Zoops! I wish we would follow their example at the end.
Monday, February 18, 2008
The Poison Plastic
I have in recent months been trying to rid our house of plastics. An absolutely impossible task to be sure, but a little at a time I am making headway. My biggest sucess has been getting most of our bulk cooking items into glass and what plastic we do have has a recycling number of 1, 2, 4, and 5. Basically not 3, 6 or 7. Those are the really icky ones.
Why am I doing this? Well, plastics can be bad, some of it really bad. It has been linked with genetic defects and cancer. I don't want my food sitting in plastic that may be contaminating our bodies. I don't want my kids sucking on toys that have mercury, dioxins, and phthalates etc. in them if I can avoid it.
Of course I do have kiddos, so getting rid of all plastics is NEVER going to happen. But I am also trying to avoid toys, such as those made in China, that might have painted/dyed with leaded paint. I am not going for perfection, just improvement!
I saw this cartoon online which is funny and talks a lot about how bad vinyl is for our bodies. I even showed it to the kiddos and we all went downstairs together to remove the shower curtain. Not sure how the mold thing will work out with that, but I will find something else I am sure!
http://www.besafenet.com/pvc/samsuds/index.htm
Plus the website that cartoon is on has a lot of other info on vinyl. Check it out.
Why am I doing this? Well, plastics can be bad, some of it really bad. It has been linked with genetic defects and cancer. I don't want my food sitting in plastic that may be contaminating our bodies. I don't want my kids sucking on toys that have mercury, dioxins, and phthalates etc. in them if I can avoid it.
Of course I do have kiddos, so getting rid of all plastics is NEVER going to happen. But I am also trying to avoid toys, such as those made in China, that might have painted/dyed with leaded paint. I am not going for perfection, just improvement!
I saw this cartoon online which is funny and talks a lot about how bad vinyl is for our bodies. I even showed it to the kiddos and we all went downstairs together to remove the shower curtain. Not sure how the mold thing will work out with that, but I will find something else I am sure!
http://www.besafenet.com/pvc/samsuds/index.htm
Plus the website that cartoon is on has a lot of other info on vinyl. Check it out.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
BOBB
I promise this blog is not going to become all about doulas, but I am excited to be volunteering soon at the screeing of this film about birth.
Don’t miss the DFW Area screening of The Business of Being Born!
Saturday, February 9, 2008, 10:30 a.m.
Providence Church, Frisco, Texas
Tickets: $5 at the door; $4 in advance through eventbrite:
businessofbeingborn dfw.blogspot. combusinessofbeingborn dfw.eventbrite. com
Don’t miss the DFW Area screening of The Business of Being Born!
Saturday, February 9, 2008, 10:30 a.m.
Providence Church, Frisco, Texas
Tickets: $5 at the door; $4 in advance through eventbrite:
businessofbeingborn dfw.blogspot. combusinessofbeingborn dfw.eventbrite. com
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Pushed
This in an excerpt from a book review I wrote for my doula certification course. The book is called Pushed and written by Jennifer Block.
So all you pregnant ladies, put down What to Expect When You Are Expecting and pick up Pushed. It will tell you much more acuratly what you should expect when you walk into a hospital to deliver your baby!
Pushed, Jennifer Block, 2007
This book is phenomenal on many different levels. It is packed with concrete statistical analysis of modern childbirth practices, a critical eye toward the ever increasing number of births via c-section, a close look at what constitutes, and doesn’t, evidence based care in obstetrics and a historical context to understand why and when vaginal birth became the over managed and over controlled process it is today. Block concludes her in depth analysis with several chapters focusing on various effects the change from expectant management of childbirth to active management have had on our culture, women and overall how these changes should have an influence in the ongoing fight for reproductive rights in this country.
The last four chapters are full of case studies and the author actually shadows an illegal midwife. This section of the book was for me literally impossible to put down. The stories Block shares are engaging, heartbreaking and inspirational all at the same time. No matter where one stands on the issue of other reproductive rights (i.e. abortion), the tie in Block makes to the current treatment of women by healthcare providers, hospitals and insurance companies to reproductive and womens rights in general is compelling and effective.
There is not much that I didn’t like about this book. There are a great deal of statistics in the first section of the book and stopping to comprehend each new statistic makes for a cumbersome read. However, I felt most every statistic and study she included were appropriate. Block also uses lots of names and refers back to these same people later in a chapter or even later in the book. At times trying to figure out who the person was that she was referring to could be difficult since the original mention of the name was several pages prior in that chapter.
I think the most significant thing I learned from this book is the completeness of evidence-based data that exists and confirms that the active management of labor is flawed. Sadly the other significant fact I learned is that nobody seems to care and nobody shares this evidence with women, including doctors, hospitals or even women’s rights groups. She uses the National Organization of Women as an example of a group that has an official platform concerning women’s rights during childbirth that includes the availability of legal midwifes and VBACs, but that NOW does not promote this agenda because it puts them in conflict with the powerful lobbies of pharmaceutical companies and ACOG (American Council of Obstetrics and Gynecologists). She also discusses how ACOG has been more interested in maintaining status quo rather than examining and adopting evidence based practices. This preservation of active management of labor is due to misinformation, the ease of OB’s work schedules when c-sections and inductions are common, and the perceived liability risks.
What Block does say is that at the grass root level this issue is bubbling. She uses the examples of Mothering.com, ICAN and other groups that are supporting women and connecting expectant mothers with healthcare, legal or not, that will fight one baby at a time to change the way we think of birth. She also is realistic in showing that putting women in a position without choices when it comes to their medical care creates situations where women do not seek any kind of care at all or are left driving hours during labor to a midwife in another state. While this situation is usually safe, it is still an irony that women now sometimes have to choose between unacceptable medical care and non at all. Block does a good job describing the rising numbers of unassisted births that are happening in the country due to restrictive VBAC laws and the narrowing definition of normal vaginal birth.
This book also puts what happens in actively managed births into a historical perspective. For those of us drawn to the natural birth process it can be hard to understand why something like an episiotomy or continual fetal monitoring is common practice. Pushed helps to explain that most of these practices were not originally designed to be used in the form they are used in today and how it is that they came to be used as they are currently. The book also goes into detail about the pressures that face doctors and hospitals in terms of technology and liability. Knowing this reality makes me more likely to understand and emphasize with an OB or hospital that uses these procedures despite the evidence against them..
Furthermore, the book is inspirational in showing that helping women in childbirth does matter in both a personal and a cultural way. I anticipate that being a doula can get frustrating sometimes, especially when working in hospitals and watching clients deal with interventions and pressure for these interventions. Remembering the stories in this book will provide encouragement.
So all you pregnant ladies, put down What to Expect When You Are Expecting and pick up Pushed. It will tell you much more acuratly what you should expect when you walk into a hospital to deliver your baby!
Pushed, Jennifer Block, 2007
This book is phenomenal on many different levels. It is packed with concrete statistical analysis of modern childbirth practices, a critical eye toward the ever increasing number of births via c-section, a close look at what constitutes, and doesn’t, evidence based care in obstetrics and a historical context to understand why and when vaginal birth became the over managed and over controlled process it is today. Block concludes her in depth analysis with several chapters focusing on various effects the change from expectant management of childbirth to active management have had on our culture, women and overall how these changes should have an influence in the ongoing fight for reproductive rights in this country.
The last four chapters are full of case studies and the author actually shadows an illegal midwife. This section of the book was for me literally impossible to put down. The stories Block shares are engaging, heartbreaking and inspirational all at the same time. No matter where one stands on the issue of other reproductive rights (i.e. abortion), the tie in Block makes to the current treatment of women by healthcare providers, hospitals and insurance companies to reproductive and womens rights in general is compelling and effective.
There is not much that I didn’t like about this book. There are a great deal of statistics in the first section of the book and stopping to comprehend each new statistic makes for a cumbersome read. However, I felt most every statistic and study she included were appropriate. Block also uses lots of names and refers back to these same people later in a chapter or even later in the book. At times trying to figure out who the person was that she was referring to could be difficult since the original mention of the name was several pages prior in that chapter.
I think the most significant thing I learned from this book is the completeness of evidence-based data that exists and confirms that the active management of labor is flawed. Sadly the other significant fact I learned is that nobody seems to care and nobody shares this evidence with women, including doctors, hospitals or even women’s rights groups. She uses the National Organization of Women as an example of a group that has an official platform concerning women’s rights during childbirth that includes the availability of legal midwifes and VBACs, but that NOW does not promote this agenda because it puts them in conflict with the powerful lobbies of pharmaceutical companies and ACOG (American Council of Obstetrics and Gynecologists). She also discusses how ACOG has been more interested in maintaining status quo rather than examining and adopting evidence based practices. This preservation of active management of labor is due to misinformation, the ease of OB’s work schedules when c-sections and inductions are common, and the perceived liability risks.
What Block does say is that at the grass root level this issue is bubbling. She uses the examples of Mothering.com, ICAN and other groups that are supporting women and connecting expectant mothers with healthcare, legal or not, that will fight one baby at a time to change the way we think of birth. She also is realistic in showing that putting women in a position without choices when it comes to their medical care creates situations where women do not seek any kind of care at all or are left driving hours during labor to a midwife in another state. While this situation is usually safe, it is still an irony that women now sometimes have to choose between unacceptable medical care and non at all. Block does a good job describing the rising numbers of unassisted births that are happening in the country due to restrictive VBAC laws and the narrowing definition of normal vaginal birth.
This book also puts what happens in actively managed births into a historical perspective. For those of us drawn to the natural birth process it can be hard to understand why something like an episiotomy or continual fetal monitoring is common practice. Pushed helps to explain that most of these practices were not originally designed to be used in the form they are used in today and how it is that they came to be used as they are currently. The book also goes into detail about the pressures that face doctors and hospitals in terms of technology and liability. Knowing this reality makes me more likely to understand and emphasize with an OB or hospital that uses these procedures despite the evidence against them..
Furthermore, the book is inspirational in showing that helping women in childbirth does matter in both a personal and a cultural way. I anticipate that being a doula can get frustrating sometimes, especially when working in hospitals and watching clients deal with interventions and pressure for these interventions. Remembering the stories in this book will provide encouragement.
Thursday, January 3, 2008
Great quote
Love this quote I read in someone's online siggie. So true!
"The Bible calls debt a curse, and children a blessing. In our society, we apply for a curse and reject blessings. What is wrong with this picture?"--- Doug Phillips, Vision Forum Ministries
"The Bible calls debt a curse, and children a blessing. In our society, we apply for a curse and reject blessings. What is wrong with this picture?"--- Doug Phillips, Vision Forum Ministries
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